Dear Younger me,

I tell folks to live our best life in every day because time waits for no one. I am over 50 and this is the latter part of life rather than the first 1-49. I do not want to be wasting my precious time. There is probably less time left in our live than more, so we should cherish it. Anyone who knows me know that I do not like lies. I am as transparent as they come. Anyone can come to me, ask anything and I will say, yes, I said it or I will say, no, I did not. No one needs to go behind my back and say anything, just ask me and you know I will tell you!

I once wrote in 2018 for my birthday in chapter 50s, what I would tell a younger picture I posted from High School. I told this girl (picture of me) to be patient and wait on God because He will lead her and carry her through life’s obstacle courses. I told her it was ok for her to cry because she will have more laughter than tears. I told her to be true to herself and not let folks transform her. I told her to savor each moment, laugh, dance and be selfish sometimes. I told her she will be a mother, a wife, graduate with a Master’s degree, travel and hopefully become a grandma one day. I also told her she would gain a few pounds. I told that girl, I would kiss her and tell her that no matter how bad it looks, she will be alright.

Well, Readers, I became a grandmother, a little over a year later.

My point is, when we are going through life’s pain, we do not see beyond our current hurts. We never think it will get better. However, I am here to tell you, we cannot stay and wallow in depression, fear or sadness. We must thrive and move or get left behind. Depression is a sad state to be in, forever. Whether things don’t work out in a relationship, a career, school, divorce, separation or whatever, let’s keep going. I promise you, it will get better! I have always been on the move and not wait for anyone to do for me or take me somewhere. My mother had great advice, although some may not have been appreciated at the time. My mom used to say, I did not have Siamese twins, you are not stuck to anyone! Go do and be (what?). Now, I get it. I miss her!

Dear younger me, that girl in the picture was 17 at the time. She got married at the tender age of 19, to someone seven years, her senior. She had her first kid at 20 (a kid having a kid), my 2nd kid came 9 years later, and my separation followed, shortly after. I raised 2 kids, alone, with the help of God. So If I kept it together for them, you all can keep it together, as well. Folks, men or women, if someone cheats, life does not end. It can never be that bad. However, i can and will say, it gets better, with time. Let me say this, that young girl, scrounged, worked many jobs, kept house, and spoiled and loved on her boys. They are my joy. Because my marriage did not work with their father, does not mean I gave up. We were strained for many years, but I held my own. Oh, please, Readers, I dated, was dumped because I had higher standards, was engaged, dated again and again, and I dumped several dudes because of cheating. This is not my first rodeo.

In this 2nd marriage, however, I am 12 years older than my current husband. He knew it, and still pursued me, hard! I told him from jump, I will not tolerate a cheater. My husband assumed I meant everyone else, but him. He hid that secret for years. That was a shocker for me. I did not see it coming from him. I guess I was naive and thought it would never happen to me, with him. I always said, I am better and deserve better. (yep, folks always said that I was snooty, and yes, I am). You cannot hurt the one you profess to love so much. Yes, Readers, I am a forgiving wife. But I can no longer be his wife, if that makes sense.

This is the same thing I would tell all of you now. If something does not work, ok, try another. There is always hope in future outcomes. Not conjugating Ver’s, but in the words of my mom—Go, Be, Do!

Hebrews 11:1 Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.

Positive affirmation: Today is a beautiful day to go for a walk and talk to God!

Z88.3